Weird thoughts

I have mentioned recently that I have been doing a lot of physical labor while working on my pond. That has freed my mind to wander where ever it will and I have had some really strange thoughts. Oh I have had some very deep thoughts that I have pondered for hours, but let me tell you about what I was thinking today.

I can just picture it now. A world renowned director is in the process of filming part of his documentary in the hills of West Virginia. The scene is set in a valley, filled with dense layers of fog, it has a small stream running through it and the sun is rising on another day. The narrator can be heard:

“We can see as every so slowly they start to leave their homes. They look around cautiously to see if anyone is about. They are ever alert, as being aware of ones surroundings at all times is the only thing that ensures their safety. They are careful to not leave any trace that could lead a predator to their door so as to protect their mate and any offspring inside. Watch as they get onto the trails and roadways that lead them away from their homes and out into the dangerous world. Watch the fog slowly begin to rise as the sunlight hits it and join me on this journey into the secret lives of ……….Lesbians in the mist.” Cut to commercial.

Of course the commercial would be for Viagra or Enzyte or some other product that has nothing in common with the subject matter at hand.  (Do you care about natural male enhancement?) Or maybe it would be one of those commercials for well known companies that target gays and lesbians but only on the “gay” channel. I would love to see the travel sites and certain car companies play those same commercials on regular tv. But I guess that won’t happen anytime soon.

But I digress. But can one digress from mindless dribble and flights of fancy? I guess I can because I just said I did. So back to the subject at hand, and if I could find the subject I would gladly get back to it. Oh yeah, strange thoughts. Boy I have had my fair share lately. After I quit laughing at my documentary thoughts, I started contemplating the mysteries of dryer lint. Okay I know a weird thought but where does all that lint come from? One would think it came from all of the clothes but if that were true, wouldn’t the clothes disappear?

 Maybe they only shrink. That would explain the lint and the fact that my clothes are not as loose as they used to be. Maybe dryer lint is made up of lost socks. That would explain why I have 900 socks and only 3 pairs.

Oh then that leads me to contemplate pantyhose. I swear the makers of pantyhose have hidden cameras in our bedrooms and they love to laugh as they watch us squirm and puff and pant trying to get those darn things up over the hips. I think some sadist is out there laughing and rolling on the floor congratulating themselves for making women think pantyhose are sexy. Well okay I admit they are but are they really worth it? Okay but only on certain occasions.

So that are some of the weird and wonderful things I have been thinking about. Weird I know, but the most important question I have left for last. Who in the world thought of boiling pork bones and such to make jello? And how can that wonderful fruity comfort food come from that?